Some people have opinions like the word epic shouldn't be used, and I have one thing to say to that! It's still okay if I'm writing a really long poem, right? This is the tale of Beochicken! Or at least the first couple parts. I'm not sure how long this will be, but if it's anything like Beowulf the end will be nonsense. In order to remind you that all content of an epic should be shouted mightily this is written in all caps.
Beochicken Prelude
DARK FORCES BREWED AS THE WORLD WAS HEWN
IN THE EARLY AGES THE BEASTS WERE TORN ASUNDER
BLOOD BLENDS TOGETHER UNSEEN FORMS COLLUDE
WHAT REMAINED CAME FORTH AS A THREAT TO FOWL
THIS THREAT HAD NO NAME TO OWN
BUT THE ROOSTER WHO WOULD BEST IT
HE IS FOREVER WELL AND TRULY KNOWN
WITH ENDLESS MIGHT HE WOULD LOSE NO FIGHT
LO AND BEHOLD FOR 'TIS THE TALE OF BEOCHICKEN!
Beochicken Verse I
HIS WARRIORS WERE CALLED FORTH
FOR THE GOOD OF THE DAY HAD WANED
LED FORTH BY BEOCHICKEN THEY MET THEM
AS A FOWL OF MIGHT AND VALOR BEOCHICKEN STOOD
FOES IN HIS PATH HE SMOTE WITH MIGHTY PECKS
UNHINDERED BY WEAKNESS HE FACED THEM ALONE
THOSE WITH HIM COULD ONLY WATCH IN AWE
THE ENEMIES BROKE BEFORE HIS MIGHT
THEY WENT AFTER THE WARRIORS
BUT BEOCHICKEN BROUGHT NO LESSER FOWL
THE WARRIORS LASHED OUT WITH BEAK AND SPUR
AND THE FOES WERE TORN FURTHER ASUNDER
TRULY THE LORDS MUST BE WAITING FOR GOOD REASON
THESE LANDS WERE FILLED WITH DEVILISH FOES NOW
BEOCHICKEN'S WARRIORS REACHED THE HOUSE
THE ROOST OF THE LORDS OF THE LANDS
LORDS HAD FALLEN FROM ON HIGH
THE THREAT TORE THE LORDS TO SHREDS
FEW REMAINED AND THEY HAD CALLED
BEOCHICKEN STOOD FORTH FROM HIS MEN
THE LORDS TOLD HIM OF THE THREAT
BEOCHICKEN THOUGHT ON THE THREAT
THUS SPOKE THE MIGHTY HERO
CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK
BUCK BUCK BUCKAWK
COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO
AT THIS THE LORDS STARED
HIS WORDS WERE ARROGANT BUT
BEOCHICKEN HAD BEEN NEEDED AND THUS
THEY HAD NO CHOICE
THIS FOWL AND CRUDE ROOSTER
HE WOULD BE THEIR CHAMPION AND STAND
SOON HE WOULD REND THE THREAT WITH BEAK AND SPUR
June 26, 2013
Dual Chicken Vs The Squid Beast
By
Chicken Maker
12:35 AM
Today I did a throw-back piece to the one series I made that actually maintained a fairly solid set of events. Dual Chicken is my favorite f the stupid things I've done, which reminds me the Plot have that I promised will be shifting in style to something more like Dual Chicken, with a series of images and a text section rather than a comic strip format.
Boring Part - Sunday Post Article
[...] It is unknown was happened to the beast that had been terrifying the coast recently but chunks of flesh believed to be its remains have been floating up to shore for several days and the police have announced that the beaches will be reopened at some point in the following weeks. [...]
Boring Part - Sunday Post Article
[...] It is unknown was happened to the beast that had been terrifying the coast recently but chunks of flesh believed to be its remains have been floating up to shore for several days and the police have announced that the beaches will be reopened at some point in the following weeks. [...]
June 20, 2013
Tough Guy.
By
Chicken Maker
9:18 AM
This is a touch guy. I'm sure you can tell from his styled comb and angry eyes. Also I did a video with it. It shows my totally not starting with the premise methodology. YouTube
June 17, 2013
Hotline Chicken
By
Chicken Maker
4:28 PM
I recently played the hyper-violent game Hotline Miami. It's about a murderer with a rubber mask. Now, as the game progresses you unlock all sorts of masks, but the default on with no abilities is a chicken.
June 15, 2013
I am posting up my new game. It is called Claim Jump. It was designed for a Print and Play contest over on Board Game Geek with the requirement that it was the size of a postcard. So it is, with the front and back included here. Now I know what you're thinking, but just look at Green. I wouldn't leave the game sad and chicken-less.
Robin Gibson posted up a version of this game with nicer art. Also actually usable as a postcard. Check it out here.
Claim Jump: Print and Play Board Game
By
Chicken Maker
10:07 PM
I am posting up my new game. It is called Claim Jump. It was designed for a Print and Play contest over on Board Game Geek with the requirement that it was the size of a postcard. So it is, with the front and back included here. Now I know what you're thinking, but just look at Green. I wouldn't leave the game sad and chicken-less.
Robin Gibson posted up a version of this game with nicer art. Also actually usable as a postcard. Check it out here.
June 13, 2013
How To Draw a Chicken
By
Chicken Maker
12:05 PM
I changed video capture programs and finally succeeded in making a new chicken video. I had a headset on so I figured I may as well just talk right through what I was doing. Expect more drawing videos in the future because well... It's not really anything on top of already drawing it. YouTube Video Link!
It is the Gray One by the way. This picture does have a title. It is a pretty generic chicken though. No cowboy hat or anything. Wanted to be straight forward on the first video in a while.
It is the Gray One by the way. This picture does have a title. It is a pretty generic chicken though. No cowboy hat or anything. Wanted to be straight forward on the first video in a while.
June 11, 2013
Poultry-Geist
By
Chicken Maker
8:36 PM
The Poultry-Geist is a truly mischievous spirit, often knocking over expensive vases with his unworldly powers and playing of shelves.
This pun is so good. I'm sad to say I didn't come up with it. A friend said it to me and I was struck by my foolishness.
This pun is so good. I'm sad to say I didn't come up with it. A friend said it to me and I was struck by my foolishness.
Shakespeare
By
Chicken Maker
6:59 PM
To bawk or not to bawk. That is the cluck.
No, that made no sense at all. This is definitely Shakespeare. I tried really hard. Gave him a ruffle thing, and a nice slick-back. Kinda looked at his eyebrows in an old drawing.
Challenge Complete!
No, that made no sense at all. This is definitely Shakespeare. I tried really hard. Gave him a ruffle thing, and a nice slick-back. Kinda looked at his eyebrows in an old drawing.
Challenge Complete!
Hi
By
Chicken Maker
1:32 AM
Hello Nathan. I noticed you're hitting up all my stuff. I'm pretty pumped about it. Tell all your friends. Stick around and be a regular if you like it. We could always use more of those.
This is the sort of thing that will make no sense out of context or in the future for someone else's archive binge I suppose. It's a perfectly good "Hi" though.
This is the sort of thing that will make no sense out of context or in the future for someone else's archive binge I suppose. It's a perfectly good "Hi" though.
June 05, 2013
Anime Hen
By
Chicken Maker
10:52 PM
This is a lady from an anime. That's not really accurate per say. I mean it's just a lady chicken with an anime eye, but I was looking at that lady from Captain Harlock whose name I can never remember so I suppose it's based on that. I mean I even put the skull and crossbones on the shoulder.
Challenge Complete
Challenge Complete
Chicken Soup
By
Chicken Maker
10:31 PM
This is some chicken broth with the little green bits and a few globs of what may be chicken. I couldn't say for sure. All I can say for sure is...
CHALLENGE COMPLETE!
EDIT: By special request now with sparkles and a moustache
I always suspected Windows 7 paint was good for something.
CHALLENGE COMPLETE!
EDIT: By special request now with sparkles and a moustache
I always suspected Windows 7 paint was good for something.
June 02, 2013
As I suggested in the comments this picture should be colored using crayons. The stars didn't come out so well but otherwise it's quite good I think.
Books Crayon Coloring
By
Chicken Maker
1:00 AM
As I suggested in the comments this picture should be colored using crayons. The stars didn't come out so well but otherwise it's quite good I think.
June 01, 2013
Books
By
Chicken Maker
12:26 AM
I sold 11 copies of Chicken Heroics, exceeding my sales goal by 1. I'm thrilled about it. So I did one more piece of art that would fit in it... Not that it's actually in it at all. Well, whatever I'm bound to do more with it at some point. Maybe this will slide in at that point. It's a chicken mage with three spell books floating around him. I mean that sort of thing is magic 101, right?